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RPetry

Funny, non-TGS posts...

Question

I am an attorney and for my personal email I add the following signature:

,-._.-,

 

v)"(v

 

(_o_)

 

Ruff!! Ruff!!

 

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

 

JIM a/k/a RedDog!

 

IMPORTANT NOTICE: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or no grammatical use and may be ignored.

 

No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes.

 

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Yep, I get drunk on Christmas eve too! Nothin beats a bottle of Jameson and a TBS marathon of A Christmas story.

 

I'm 9 shots in right now. Kids are in bed, wife is taking a bubble bath and I'm enjoying my tradition. Tomorrow is pajamas and bacon wrapped BBQ pulled pork!

 

Life is grand.

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