The Rob

CPA- With my business and farm expenses, I let someone who deals with it all the time take care of it for me. Robert

Try this website out for some of your old lost school pictures. Enjoy!!! Robert http://www.worldschoolphotographs.com/

The Preacher from our church sent that website to me! I thought that was sooo nice of him! Robert

Here is something everyone needs to have filled out! Robert Living Will I, _________________________ (fill in the blank), being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of peckerwood politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade Biology if their lives depended on it. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for a cold beer or some chocolate, it should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse, children and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day. Under no circumstances shall the members of the Legislature enact a special law to keep me on life-support machinery. It is my wish that these boneheads mind their own damn business, and pay attention instead to the health, education and future of the millions of Americans who AREN'T in a permanent coma. Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into this case .. I don't care how many Fundamentalist votes they're trying to scrounge for their run for a future presidency, it is my wish that they play politics with someone else’s life and leave me alone to die in peace. I couldn't care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don't know these people, and I certainly haven't authorized them to preach and crusade on my behalf. They should mind their own business, too. If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into a political cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make his or her existence a living hell. _______________________________________ ____________________________________ Signature Witness

Howard, Change it to fit your needs, but as Ryan said, "Don't forget that notary seal!!" Robert

I use a 1 hour time frame. I will schedule, say a time of 9:00, but tell them it could be a 1/2 hour either way. If I'm going to be late any at all, I have their number and call them. I try to treat the customer the way that I would want to be treated! Robert

MISSING CLINTON Just watched a show on Canadian TV. There was a black comedian who said he misses Bill Clinton. "Yep, that's right - I miss Bill Clinton! He was the closest thing we ever got to having a black man as President. Number 1- He played the sax. Number 2- He smoked weed. Number 3-He had his way with ugly white women. Even now? Look at him... his wife works, and he don't! And, he gets a check from the government every month. Manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's shelves this week with "Clinton Soup," in honor of one of the nations' most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water. Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will be in production in Canada this year. When asked what he thought about foreign affairs, Clinton replied, "I don't know, I never had one." American Indians nicknamed Bill Clinton "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can't fly. Clinton lacked only three things to become one of America's finest leaders: integrity, vision, wisdom. Clinton was doing the work of three men: Larry, Curly and Moe. The Clinton revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know." Clinton will be recorded in history as the only President to do Hanky Panky between Bushes. GOD BLESS I thought this had a ring of truth to it. Robert

When the Founding Fathers wrote the Constitution, they didn't trust the general population to be smart enough to vote intelligently. That is why the Electoral college was formed, to keep us uneducated hicks from making a bad choice! Of course when all you are given to choose from are bad choices, how are you to do otherwise?

Are wooden extension ladders even available anymore? I can remember my Grandfather having one. My ladders are: 1-40' aluminum 1-24' fiberglass 1-16' fiberglass 1-multifold aluminum extension ladder (excellent for steps) 1-8' fiberglass stepladder 2-6' fiberglass stepladder Robert

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wiped a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" She whispers as she steps into the room, "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring and senstive. "Yes I do," she replies. The husband paused. The words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making love?" "Yes, I remember," said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continued. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?'" "I remember that too" she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said... "I would have gotten out today."

5 Reasons Not To Mess With A Child ***************************************** A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little gi rl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him". **************************************** A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute." **************************************** A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill." **************************************** The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead. " **************************************** The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving f urther along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples. A friend sent this to me, I thought it was cute! Robert

Guns vs. Doctors A: The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000. B: Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000 accidental deaths per physician is 0.171 per year. Now consider this: A: The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000. B: The number of accidental gun deaths per year (all age groups) is 1,500. The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is 0.000188 per year. Statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners. Remember, "Guns don't kill people, doctors do!" FACT: Not everyone has a gun, but almost everyone has at least one doctor. Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand. If this is true??????? Where are all the anti-Doctor nuts at?

After you read this, you should know everything. Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. (I keep my toothbrush in the living room now) The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma. No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times. Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes. (more government regulations to come) You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television. Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older. The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum. The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache. A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother's first flight. The wingspan of the B36, a retired USAF bomber, was twice as long. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class. ( I wonder if they used Six Sigma) Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Here is an excellent recipie for grilling chicken or pork. Just take an roll it in the coating mix before putting it on the grill. I have tried it on deer, pheasant, and beef, did not taste very good. It makes quite a bit of the mix, so I store it in a 5qt ice cream container. Be sure an use a seperate container to roll the meat in so that you don't contaminate the mix. While grilling be sure and have an Ice cold Michelob Light in your hand, makes the grilling time a whole lot better!!! Enjoy!!! Robert Coating for meat to grill 1- 4lb sugar 2- season salt (8oz) 1- lemon/pepper ( same size of bottle as above, not sure of the oz) 1- paprika ( same as above) 1- parsley (5oz) 1- garlic powder (2.5oz) You can very the mix to suit your own taste. Start with this and then make it to suit your self.

Beth, I sure hope so. Can't wait for some good cajun recipies from down south. What is popular up in the Northeast to put on the grill? Robert

I don't see no way of regulating guns to keep them away from the irresponsible/criminal. Regulating guns will probably keep them from the responsible law abiding citizen, but not the irresponsible criminal. A comparison would be that locks keep out the dishonest, but that is not true. Locks keep out the honest person, but hardly ever the dishonest criminal. I think gun regulation would be along the line, working for the responsible, not the irresponsible. As far as guns and cars, which one kills more people every day in the U.S.? I don't know, was just wondering. Robert

Some of these anti-gun radicals act like guns are the only thing that kills. People were killing each other long before guns were invented. Guns are like any piece of equipment, if not handled right and treated with respect then they can be deadly. As Alan pointed out, people steal cars and kill with them. If you want to kill someone, then there are many ways to do so. Guns are probably the easiest to kill with, but by no means the only thing to do so with. Robert

First question to find out is if it's stucco or dryvit. Dryvit is dense styrofoam covered with a thin coat of mortar. Stucco has a diamond metal mesh that is covered with three different coats of mortar. Once you find that out, then you will know how to repair it if you want to. Robert

On the iron railing you will need to use an enamel primer before it is topcoated with a latex based paint. If not, the iron will rust and show through in no time at all. Enamel does not spread nearly as easy as the latex will on the iron railing. We done all the painting on a remodeled doctors office last year including the iron railing, and the primer had to be enamel and so did the topcoat. This was per the County Health Department regulations, something to do with germs. Just wanted to pass on my experience with iron railing, hopes it helps. Robert

One Sunday a pastor told the congregation that the church needed some extra > money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra >in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able >to pick out three hymns. > > > >After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed >that someone had placed a $1,000 bill in offering. He was so excited that >he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he'd like to >personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate. > > > > > >A very quiet, elderly and saintly lady all the way in the back shyly raised >her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her >way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much >and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns. > > > >Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the >three handsomest men in the building and said, "I'll take him > > > > > > >and him > > > > > > > >and him." > > > > > > > >

For those of you that like a little trivia, here is a good link to some. Robert http://www.sheppardsoftware.com/web_games_trivia.htm

We had two Schlotzky's here in town for a few years, then last year I went to eat there, and they were closed. I liked their food, and with the state university amd two other colleges in town, I was very surprised they didn't have enough business. But the sourdough bread was good! Robert

Oldies or Country, depends on my mood.

I like Sonics since there is alot of them around here. When I'm in St. louis, I like to eat at Fudruckers. They have really good burgers. If I'm after donuts, it has to be Krispy Kreme, fresh out the oven, icing still hot! I know, I chose more than two!

Thought this might be interesting for those of you who live in California or other Earthquake prone places! It seems logical to me. Robert Subject: How to survive in an Earthquake This makes very interesting reading. It goes against everything you've probably been told about how to survive an earthquake. In this time of earthquakes, tsunamis, mud slides etc...read this...it may save your life. Then pass it along to anyone you would like to be alive after an earthquake. EXTRACT FROM DOUG COPP'S ARTICLEON THE "TRIANGLE OF LIFE" Edited by Larry Linn for MAA Safety Committee brief on 4/13/04. My name is Doug Copp. I am the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the American Rescue Team International (ARTI), the world's most experienced rescue team. The information in this article will save lives in an earthquake. I have crawled inside 875 collapsed buildings, worked with rescue teams from 60 countries, founded rescue teams in several countries, and I am a member of many rescue teams from many countries. I was the United Nations expert in Disaster Mitigation for two years. I have worked at every major disaster in the world since 1985, except for simultaneous disasters. In 1996 we made a film which proved my survival methodology to be correct. The Turkish Federal Government, City of Istanbul, University of Istanbul Case Productions and ARTI cooperated to film this practical, scientific test. We collapsed a school and a home with 20 mannequins inside. Ten mannequins did "duck and cover," and ten mannequins I used in my "triangle of life" survival method. After the simulated earthquake collapse we crawled through the rubble and entered the building to film and document the results. The film, in which I practiced my survival techniques under directly observable, scientific conditions, relevant to building collapse, showed there would have been zero percent survival for those doing duck and cover. There would likely have been 100 percent survivability for people using my method of the "triangle of life." This film has been seen by millions of viewers on television in Turkey and the rest of Europe, and it was seen in the USA, Canada and Latin America on the TV program Real TV. The first building I ever crawled inside of was a school in Mexico City during the 1985 earthquake. Every child was under their desk. Every child was crushed to the thickness of their bones. They could have survived by lying down next to their desks in the aisles. It was obscene, unnecessary and I wondered why the children were not in the aisles. I didn't at the time know that the children were told to hide under something. Simply stated, when buildings collapse, the weight of the ceilings falling upon the objects or furniture inside crushes these objects, leaving a space or void next to them. This space is what I call the "triangle of life". The l! arger the object, the stronger, and the less it will compact. The less the object compacts, the larger the void, the greater the probability that the person who is using this void for safety will not be injured. The next time you watch collapsed buildings, on television, count the "triangles" you see formed. They are everywhere. It is the most common shape, you will see, in a collapsed building. They are everywhere. TEN TIPS FOR EARTHQUAKE SAFETY 1) Most everyone who simply "ducks and covers" when buildings collapse are crushed to death. People who get under objects, like desks or cars, are crushed. 2) Cats, dogs and babies often naturally curl! up in the fetal position. You should too in an earthquake. It is a natural safety/survival instinct. You can survive in a smaller void. Get next to an object, next to a sofa, next to a large bulky object that will compress slightly but leave a void next to it. 3) Wooden buildings are the safest type of construction to be in during an earthquake. Wood is flexible and moves with the force of the earthquake. If the wooden building does collapse, large survival voids are created. Also, the wooden building has less concentrated, crushing weight. Brick buildings will break into individual bricks. Bricks will cause many injuries but less squashed bodies than concrete slabs. 4) If you are in bed during the night and an earthquake occurs, simply roll off the bed. A safe void will exist around the bed.. Hotels can achieve a much greater survival rate in earthquakes, simply by posting a sign on the back of the door of every room telling occupants to lie down on the floor, next to the bottom of the bed during an earthquake. 5) If an earthquake happens and you cannot easily escape by getting out the door or window, then lie down and curl up in the fetal position next to a sofa, or large chair. 6) Most everyone who gets under a doorway when buildings collapse is killed. How? If you stand under a doorway and the doorjamb falls forward or backward you will be crushed by the ceiling above. If the door jam falls sideways you will be cut in half by the doorway.. In either case, you will be killed! 7) Never go to the stairs. The stairs have a different "moment of frequency" (they swing separately from the main part of the building). The stairs and remainder of the building continuously bump into each other until structural failure of the stairs takes place. The people who get on stairs before they fail are chopped up by the stair treads - horribly mutilated. Even if the building doesn't collapse, stay away from the stairs. The stairs are a likely part of the building to be damaged. Even if the stai! rs are not collapsed by the earthquake, they may collapse later when overloaded by fleeing people They should always be checked for safety, even when the rest of the building is not damaged. 8) Get Near the Outer Walls Of Buildings Or Outside Of Them If Possible - It is much better to be near the outside of the building rather than the interior. The farther inside you are from the outside perimeter of the building the greater the probability that your escape route will be blocked. 9) People inside of their vehicles are crushed when the road above falls in an earthquake and crushes their vehicles; which is exactly what happened with the slabs between the decks of the Nimitz Freeway. The victims of the San Francisco earthquake all stayed inside of their vehicles. They were all killed. They could have easily survived by getting out and sitting or lying next to their vehicles. Everyone killed would have survived if they had been able to get out of their cars and sit or lie next to them. All the crushed cars had voids 3 feet high next to them, except for the cars that had columns fall directly across them. 10) I discovered, while crawling inside of collapsed newspaper offices and other offices with a lot of paper, that paper does not compact. Large voids are found surrounding stacks of paper. Heed the word and save someone's life!