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Jon

Top ten reasons why some men favor handguns over women.

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#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9 - You can keep one handgun at home, and have another for when your on the road.

#8 - If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out

a few times.

#7 - Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for a backup.

#6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5 - A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month.

#3 - A handgun doessn't ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2 - A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

Here's the big reason a handgun is favored over a woman-

#1 - You can buy a silencer for a handgun.

Amen.

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How to fool a cop

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: "May I see your driver's license?"

Driver: "I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI."

Officer: "May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?"

Driver: "It's not my car. I stole it."

Officer: "The car is stolen?"

Driver: "That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there."

Officer: "There's a gun in the glove box?"

Driver: "Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk."

Officer: "There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?"

Driver: "Yes, sir."

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly

surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: "Sir, can I see your license?"

Driver: "Sure. Here it is."

It was valid.

Captain: "Who's car is this?"

Driver: "It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card."

The driver owned the car.

Captain: "Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?"

Driver: "Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it."

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: "Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it."

Driver: "No problem."

Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: "I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk."

Driver: "Yeah, I'll bet the lying jerk told you I was speeding, too."

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Man would love to pull the second one off someday if I ever got pulled over for speeding.

But first I would have to learn to keep a straight face!

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