Joke of the day

[Jesse 15]

Three contractors were visiting a tourist attraction on the same day. One was from New York, another from Texas, and the third from Florida.

At the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did for a living. When they all replied that they were contractors, the guard said, "Hey, we need one of the rear fences redone. Why don't you guys take a look at it and give me a bid?"

So, to the back fence they all went to check it out.

First to step up was the Florida contractor. He took out his tape measure and pencil, did some measuring and said, "Well I figure the job will run about $900. $400 for materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me."

Next was the Texas contractor. He also took out his tape measure and pencil, did some quick figuring and said, "Looks like I can do this job for $700. $300 for materials, $300 for my crew, and $100 profit for me.

Without so much as moving, the New York contractor said, "$2,700."

The guard, incredulous, looked at him and said, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?" "Easy," he said $1,000 for me, $1,000 for you and we hire the guy from Texas."

Jesse R. Kirchhoff

Kirchhoff Handyman Solutions LLC

Advanced Power Washing and Restoration Services LLC

114 Forest Hill Ave. Jefferson City, Mo 65109

Local 573-635-2708 Toll Free 1-866-635-2708 Fax 573-634-8882

E-Mail jessekirchhoff@mchsi.com

[One Tough Pressure 580]

Classic, How about this one?

I just spent several hours observing teenagers who were hanging out at our

local mall. I came to the conclusion that many teenagers in Canada are

living in poverty. Most of the young men I observed didn't even own a belt;

there was not one among the whole group. But that wasn't the sad part.

Many of them were wearing their daddy's jeans. Some of these jeans were

so big and baggy that they hung low on their hips, exposing their underwear.

I know some of them must have been ashamed their daddy was short, as

his jeans hardly went below their knees. They weren't even their daddies'

good jeans, It grieved me that in a modern, affluent society like Canada, there are people who can't afford a decent pair of jeans.

I have been thinking about asking my church to start a jeans drive for the

"poor kids at the mall." Then on Christmas Eve, I could go Christmas

caroling and distribute jeans to these poor teenagers.

But that wasn't the saddest part. It was the girls they were hanging out

with that disturbed me the most. I have never in all of my life seen such

"poor" girls. These girls had the opposite problem of the guys.

They all had to wear their little sisters' clothes. Their jeans were about

five sizes too small. I don't know how they could even put them on, let

alone button them up. Their jeans barely went over their hipbones.

Most of them also had on their little sister's top; it didn't even cover their

midsection. Oh, they were trying to hold their heads up with pride, but it

was a sad sight to see these almost grown women wearing children's clothes.

However, it was their underwear that bothered me the most. They, like the

boys, because of improper fitting of their clothes, also had their underwear

exposed. I have never seen anything like it. It looked like their underwear

was only held together by a single piece of string.

I know it also saddens your heart to receive this report on the condition

of our Canadian teenagers. While I go to bed every night with a closet

full of clothes nearby, there are millions of "mall girls" who barely have

enough material to keep it together.

[Henry B. 4]

Here's a link to a little animated movie... Most of you will just love this, a couple might be offended

AtomFilms: This Land

[Jon 533]

Now if that ain't a cute little gig.