A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant lot. One day, a
construction crew came in and began building a house on the empty lot.
The family's 5-year-old daughter became interested in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.
Eventually, the construction crew, all of them gems-in-the-rough, more or
less adopted her as a project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit
with them while they took coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs
to do here and there to make her feel important.
At the end of the first week, the men presented her with a pay envelope
which contained $2.00. The little girl took this home to her mother, who
said all the appropriate words of admiration, and suggested that they take
the money she received to the bank to start a savings account.
When they talked to the bank teller, she was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had earned her very own pay check at such a young age.
The child proudly replied, "I worked last week with the crew building the
house next door to us."
"My goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on the
house again this week, too?"
The little girl replied, "I will if those ***holes at Home Depot ever deliver the f***n' sheet rock..."
One spring day little Johney was running around the house getting under moms feet when she finally had enough and told him to go across the street where a house was being built and see if he could learn something about carpentry.
Ok Mom he said and off he went.
Later that night at the dinner table Johnneys Dad asked if he learned anything from the carpenters that day.
"Sure did Dad" he replied. And what was that Son? I learned how to set a door.
Really Son, how .
Well first you gotta cram the S.O.B. into a hole thats too F*****g small so you gotta take the c**k s****r back out again and shave a c**t hair off one side and do it again.
Johnney!! I will not stand for that language in my home!!! Now you march yourself right outside and get me a switch!!!
To which Johnney proudly replied. "Screw you Dad thats the f*****g electricians job!
Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the men walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos."
The clerk asked, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"
The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck.
He returned and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four."
"All right. How long do you need them?"
The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check."
After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."
______________________________________________________________________________
A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant lot. One day, a
construction crew came in and began building a house on the empty lot.
The family's 5-year-old daughter became interested in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.
Eventually, the construction crew, all of them gems-in-the-rough, more or
less adopted her as a project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit
with them while they took coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs
to do here and there to make her feel important.
At the end of the first week, the men presented her with a pay envelope
which contained $2.00. The little girl took this home to her mother, who
said all the appropriate words of admiration, and suggested that they take
the money she received to the bank to start a savings account.
When they talked to the bank teller, she was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had earned her very own pay check at such a young age.
The child proudly replied, "I worked last week with the crew building the
house next door to us."
"My goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on the
house again this week, too?"
The little girl replied, "I will if those ***holes at Home Depot ever deliver the f***n' sheet rock..."
______________________________________________________________________________
One spring day little Johney was running around the house getting under moms feet when she finally had enough and told him to go across the street where a house was being built and see if he could learn something about carpentry.
Ok Mom he said and off he went.
Later that night at the dinner table Johnneys Dad asked if he learned anything from the carpenters that day.
"Sure did Dad" he replied. And what was that Son? I learned how to set a door.
Really Son, how .
Well first you gotta cram the S.O.B. into a hole thats too F*****g small so you gotta take the c**k s****r back out again and shave a c**t hair off one side and do it again.
Johnney!! I will not stand for that language in my home!!! Now you march yourself right outside and get me a switch!!!
To which Johnney proudly replied. "Screw you Dad thats the f*****g electricians job!
Jesse R. Kirchhoff
Kirchhoff Handyman Solutions LLC www.midmohandyman.com
Advanced Power Washing and Restoration Services LLC www.advancedpw.com
114 Forest Hill Ave. Jefferson City, Mo 65109
Local 573-634-8882 Toll Free 1-866-635-2708
E-Mail jessekirchhoff@mchsi.com
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