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Jesse

Joke of the day

Question

> A man and a woman, who have never met before, find themselves assigned to

> the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially

> embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two are tired and fall

> asleep quickly...he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 AM, he

> leans over and gently wakes the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother

> you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second

> blanket? I'm awfully cold." "I have a better idea," she replies. "Just for

> tonight, let's pretend that we're married." "Wow! That's a great idea!!"

> he exclaims. "Good," she replies. "Get your own damn blanket!" After a

> moment of silence, he farted.

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The scene:

Car crash, occupants-5, fatalities-4, witness/survivor-1

Description of the bodies indicates a father, mother and 2 children.

No one knows how the accident occured, but the police are questioning the subject who survived the crash which appears to be the family pet...a chimp!

Officers at the scene, attempted to communicate with the chimp to get some answers but to no avial, a bystander who works with animals in a therapy center steps in and offers assistance.

Therapist to chimp: what was the father doing?

Chimp (with hand signals for reply): [hand gesture indicates drinking motion]

Officer: So thats what happened, the father was drinking and driving and caused the crash!

Feeling satisfied with that he started to leave and write up his report...

meanwhile the therapist says: wait a minute! there might be more!

Therapist to chimp: what was the mother doing?

Chimp: [hand gestures indicate ceasless mouth movements]

Officer: so the mom was bitching at the father for his drinking problem...big deal!

Therapist: hold on...

Therapist to chimp: what were the kids doing?

Chimp: [hand and arm gestures flailing around indicate that the kids were misbehaving and fighting]

Officer: ok, the kids were a distraction and the mom was trying to deal with them too!

Text book scenario, I think I have all that I need here to make my report!

Another officer caught on to the whole thing and asks the chimp:what were you doing?

Chimp:[hand and arm gestures indicate manipulating a steering wheel]!!!

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