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Jeff

Not the same

Question

Hey folks maybe you can help me. I know this is a PW BB, but theres alot of intelligent people here and maybe you have gone through what Im going to talk about. Ive tried to do a little research on the web, but Im not great at searching the web,

This a serious matter about my Mother and maybe you could help with info.

OK my mother isnt the same as she use to be and I think/I know its directly because of surgery she's had. She doesnt talk much anymore, she doesnt show any real excitement anymore. Before this surgery she was a talkative, pretty out going lady, she would laugh & joke and start conversation like everyone else. Now she just doesnt. If she was with you or at a gathering she could talk away now she basically will answer a question directed to her with a minimium amount of words. My mother realizes this is happening , but cant chamge it.

My Mom has no mental or real physical problems that we know of that is causing this, its weird its just since her surgery

Let me give you some history. My Mom is 69 yr old, basicaly healthy with recently diagnoused(sp) diabeties, not a big problem it is being monitored.

Alright she's be through alot these past few years. The love of her life my father passed away late 2004, prior to my dads death he had cancer, started with Colon cancer, got rid of that then lung cancer, got rid of that and finally it just took over. Now my Mother has always been a very strong lady in her personal & biz life. She went through a very rough 3+ years trying to help save my Dads life and taking care of all his needs, she just never gave up, taking care of him. She never complained and when someone mentioned puting him in a nursing home, she wouldnt have it. She actually loved the fact that she was here to help my dad.

Well Dad died in their house with my mother & son by his side and of course she was devistated, sad & lonely, it was a very rough time and 3 years. BUT my mom was still talkative and could hold regular conversations any time. Yes of course she was depressed, but still was outgoing, we could get her to laugh and she would still talk up a storm

Then in early 2005 wefound out my Mom had lung cancer. it was found pretty early with a routine Xray. We were all sad & amazed that she had it because she hadnt smoked in 35 years. She had some great doctors and she had surgery at MUSC in Charlestowne about 9 months ago, they removed a lobe of her lung and the surgery was a great success, per what all the doctors said. She was very strong after the surgery, taking very little pain mads and had a real quick recovery. All the follow up visits the doctors were real pleased. She is now cancer free and has a great chance of not getting the cancer back of any kind. the 2 year after surgery ar the most important time. if she get through these 2 year cancer free, she may never get cancer again, hopefully

Now since this surgery is when she started not talking & joking. Its weird and hard to describe what is going on. ITS LIKE THE SURGERY TOOK HE PERSONALITY AWAY. now my uncle had lung surgery a couple times and he says he was like this, but it was short term say a few weeks.

We've talked to doctors and I am going to talk to her doctor about this in a few weeks. We/ my family thought this would pass, of course mom has changed but we all thought with time she might get back to her old self some what, but she isnt. I know this is bothering her alot and everyone notices the change and Im very close with my Mom and we have talked about this several times. She knows its happening and cant change it. Ya sure she depressed some, being in her big home alone, but she stays at our house 1 or twice a week , she only lives a few miles away

I dont know how to better describewhats going on, other than saying the surgery basically took her voice, personality and her just being regular self away.

Sorry Im going through all this on a PW BB, but i thought maybe some of you folks know or heard of something simular to this. Its like its a side effect of surgery and doctors really havent said much about it. She's a healthy women that just doesnt say much anymore. I will be going with her to her next doctors visit and I will be stressing to the doctors whats going on and try to get some answers

Thanks everybody and if you know something about this please share it and if any of you folks no anywhere I could read about this on the web , please share it with me

I dont care if my mom didnt want to talk Im just happy to have her near me, my wife and Joshua. Joshua has been a god send, he has helped my mom and my dad when he was alive. Josh broke up the rough times and is my moms best friend she watches him 2-3 days a week. But even with Josh, she'll read him book after book , but no real conversation after its weird

Sorry for the long post and sharing all this with you folks, but your a good group of people that have seen alot in your lives

Thanks

JL

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Wow Jeff, I'm so sorry......your mother very likely has no idea how lucky she is (given what she has experienced - she probably doesn't feel that way at all) to have family that goes to the lengths that you and your wife do.

I am a research addict and will do anything I can to find information for you - anything you can send me (email or pm) that is very specific to her type cancer, ie medical terms would be helpful.

Celeste

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My guess is this...

(I am not a Dr. by a long shot) but the thought occurred to me that she may have suffered a mild stroke. Strokes tend to affect the centers of the brain associated with speech and motor functions. This could have been onset by the trauma of the operation, stress, or the diabetes itself.

I would suggest the Dr's run some tests on her for more conclusive evidence but from what I understand about diabetes this is very much a possibility.

I pray for her health and your strength.

Rod!~

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My guess is this...

(I am not a Dr. by a long shot) but the thought occurred to me that she may have suffered a mild stroke. Strokes tend to affect the centers of the brain associated with speech and motor functions. This could have been onset by the trauma of the operation, stress, or the diabetes itself.

I would suggest the Dr's run some tests on her for more conclusive evidence but from what I understand about diabetes this is very much a possibility.

I pray for her health and your strength.

Rod!~

I also was thinking mini stroke, my dad had a few we never knew about until some test althou we dd notice some changes, we were surprised that it was strokes

Now with my mom everything is totally the same with her, she has no other problems, her speach is great, clear, no real signs of what Ive seen in stroke victims. she's just not talkative and it was right after surgery

Thank you much

Celeste, it was basic lung cancer, what I was trying to find on the web is ??? is it common or does it happen that after some surgeries can some one go through what I described with my mom. Like something like a side effect

Thanks and I want you to know its not real bad its only my mom not talking much other than that we have fun with her and she's a productive smart women. Life is good and I want to help improve my mothers life. I just will be happy when we build our house and moms with us

Thanks

JL

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